Deep humor quotes about life – GREATNESS

Humor quote about life

You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.

Mae West
Quote by mae west on humor

Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results.

Narcotics Anonymous

Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.

 Mark Twain

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.

Garrison Keillor

The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.

George Carlin
Inspirational quotes With humor

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

Robert A. Heinlein

Go to heaven for the climate and hell for the company.

Benjamin Franklin Wade

It’s no use going back to yesterday, because I was a different person then.

Lewis Carroll

Have you ever noticed how ‘What the hell’ is always the right decision to make?

Terry Johnson
funny quote on decision

Creativity is knowing how to hide your sources

C.E.M. Joad

All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring.

Chuck Palahniuk

This life’s hard, but it’s harder if you’re stupid.

George V. Higgins

Never memorize something that you can look up.

Albert Einstein

When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, ‘Damn, that was fun’.

Groucho Marx

Some humans would do anything to see if it was possible to do it. If you put a large switch in some cave somewhere, with a sign on it saying ‘End-of-the-World Switch. PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH’, the paint wouldn’t even have time to dry.

Terry Pratchett

Two wrongs don’t make a right, but they make a good excuse.

Thomas Szasz
Funny sense of humor Quotes

When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That’s relativity.

Albert Einstein

There’s a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.

Oscar Levant

Quote on Reality

Reality continues to ruin my life.

Bill Watterson

Quote on Death

I’m not afraid of death; I just don’t want to be there when it happens.

Woody Allen

Quotes on book

So many books, so little time.

Frank Zappa

Be careful about reading health books. Some fine day you’ll die of a misprint.

Markus Herz

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